Ta-da!

Our group for math is almos done with the roller coaster! Wee! Finally! I swear, it's the brightest thing in the world, but I don't mind. I like it bright. It's OG.

4th period was interesting. Had some crazy discussions in the backroom. I WILL finish the book for the book group this weekend. (Woot! Three day weekend!!)

There was a quad party today. Walked around watching booties shaking, started conversating and regretted that I forgot to ask the parents for money. It was a pretty interesting turn out, considering that most of the clubs didn't really prepare for it. I found it funny how Humanitas' booth was right next to the ASA booth. Felt like there was a lot of tough competition... haha.

Cleaning up was fun. Had a water fight with a 5-gallon bottle. I lost... Hahah. Carried tables and what not in one hand with a hotdog in the other. Aren't I ever so talented? Haha!

Then off to Philosophy to one of the many Pistachio-Puke-Colored room of the C-building because Leibner's room is currently being painted. (It's the saddest thing to see his room so... dead...) We talked about "immaculation" and how crack kills... haha! Good times.

Things are getting better. I think after I hit my all-time low (academically), I've been straightening up. No more BS-ing. All IS well--or it will be. I've waited things out long enough and I'm glad my patience has gotten me this far. Now it's time to take action and I'm glad that I have a lot of good and bad history, memories and experiences that I can look back on and say "I lived through that..." At least I have some form of foundation to build upon...

I wear you.

Crazy weather..

I hate it. Cold and rainy one hour, the next: warm and sunny. It should stay at one end of the spectrum instead of jumping around all over the place.

Bitter-Sweet weekend. Definitely one of the best in a while. Very emotional, but very solemn and OG for sure. Cousin Love!!

Sometimes, when I don't write in here or when I don't express my feelings publicly, I wonder if anyone can see through my masks...

I JUST killed an ant that was crawling on my computer table. I dunno how it got there, but it's gone now. I'm evil. Hah! Well, animals have no soul so technically, I'm not evil... just heartless. Haha! That's sooo bad.

Time to head off and do some more procrastinating!

TGIF

Thank God It's Fridayyy.

It's been a VERY long day, full of tests and trying to complete homework during class... blech. And the weather wasn't much of a help either, with it being all extra warm today then getting all extra cold around 6pm. Booty. But all in all, today was probably one of the best I've had in a while.

"Nez--
Your strength is your heart pointing you to a brave future that will be filled with passion, adventure, and excitement. You just won't take "no" for an answer and you will be rewarded by others for your individuality. I promise!!"
^ That fool is freekin' THEE best!

I realized that I'd be able to hide my boyfriend (if I were to ever have one) from my parents from a good while. They give me a good amount of space and freedom. Praise God for them. And praise God they have and are raising me well--or at least I think they're doing a good job.

So I came to that conclusion because I practically went on a date. Not like I intended to, but one of my friends ditched out last minute and I didn't want the plans to go to waste. This consisted of going to Mitsuwa, eating (Mochi! =D), talking, laughing, window shopping, and praying at the Blessed Sacrament Chapel of St. Margaret Mary (where there were candidates being confirmed). It wasn't a real, official date, but dude! No lie, it's one of the best times I've had. =) Praise God for Friends.

I cried today. During some random moments, I just started crying. Weird. But still, I enjoyed it. Why? Because I needed it.

I said that today is probably one of the best days I've had in a while. I didn't mean that I was completely happy, but I felt... good. I dunno. It was just a nice day.

YOU.

Have you ever just wanted to find that one person who makes the world stop? That one person that makes everything better? That one person that breaks you down and builds you up at the same time? That one person who does all this just by giving you one of the most genuine, sincere, loving hugs that you've ever received? I don't know who "you" are, but I need YOU.

There's so much going on. So many things have been happening and it's ONLY May. As much as I want summer to get here, I am no where close to being ready for it.

I'm not afraid to die. I'm afraid to leave people behind with broken promises. I'm afraid of people leaving me behind.

I go to school to get away from home. I go home to get away from school. i go to church to get away from it all, but instead, i bring it all there. I am a totally different person in every single place. Why can't I just be one?

You...

...don't know me. And I don't want you to know me. Because your knowing me would lead to me knowing more of you. And knowing you would just hurt me more. Does this make sense?

Panday

"Ipaglalaban ko ang ating pag-ibig
Maghintay ka lamang, ako’y darating
Pagka’t sa isang taong mahal mo ng buong puso
Lahat ay gagawin makita kang muli
Makita kang muli"

That's the theme song of a Filipino show called Panday featuring Jericho Rosales and Heart Evangelista that I really like. As corny of a love story it is, as repetative the story gets, I enjoy watching it now more than ever. The creators and writers are brilliant. In a sense, there are archetypes within the story of the show, but the they show aren't satiric or parodic... it's something else... but they still are archetypes. At least I think they are...

And Rafael Rosell IV is in it too! Hah! Such a GREAT cast!! =D

PS: I think I'm obsessed with KDrama now. Particularly "Which Star Are You From?". Good show. =) You should watch it--on YouTube. Yep! Up to episode 3 is uploaded on youtube. haha.

Bests and Worsts

Just some random stuff...

One of the most beautiful, somewhat saddening and very genuine thing a person can ever witness is to see a man cry.

Aside from the pains of child birth, one of the suckiest, grossest thing a woman can experince is having a cold causing her to sneeze and cough while riding the crimson wave--if ya get what I'm saying. =) In the words of Father... uh, I forgot his name, but he was the priest who gave the homily at youth rally... "Don't you get it?"

"I'm sorry..."

I don't remember the last time I apologized for hurting someone emotionally... including the last time I apologized to Him.

Saying "I'm sorry" means diddly squat. They're just words that are witten and read in the form of writing, that are said in the form of speech, that exist to try to express the emotion of true contrition. But not once has it and not once will it ever portray the essence of that emotion. Not unless it comes with action. Not unless change occurs for the better. Not unless pain, suffering, regret and a sense of nostalgia have already been experienced by both the person apologizing and the person being apologized to.

Words mean diddly squat. But at the same time, words mean everything--especially if a phrase or sentence revolves around the controversial topic of love.

Who or what gives a word it's definition and value?

Youth Rally pt. 2

Fun stuff. =) Glad I went. Bonding with the community was awesome. Exposition was THEE best. New memories and inside jokes to laugh about. =D

Maybe there are just a lot of things going on in my mind. Who knows what's going to happen next. I REFUSE for anything more to happen. (If in need of clarification, ASK ME. DON'T go assuming things, k?)

Well, I shall be off to bed now. =) Aloha to you!

Youth Rally '06

There's something comforting about knowing that all the people you know and have learned to love are just a couple of steps away. I'm at the de Castro's house right now in preperation for Youth Rally tomorrow.

I'm sick AGAIN. I have a lot of phlegm and have been coughing randomly. I'm blogging while everyone is getting ready for the skit for tomorrow. Why? Because I don't wanna be any sick than I already am.

I like knowing that I can relate to these people and that these people can relate to me. We're not always communicating, we're not always in good moods, but those things can easily be disregarded. We can still hang out, laugh and smile and just be together. "We're all in this together..." Ha. High School Musical. I still haven't watched it but I already know the songs.

It's funny how I can blog during the moments when I should really be doing something more important that sitting and reflecting on my life.

Speaking of which, our English class is working on personal statements. I don't really know why, but that's how the teachers are running it. I guess it's all for a good cause. Anyway, I have two English teachers (our classes switch off every quarter). The first one commented on how I basically wrote to gain pity from the reader and that I should throw most of the stuff I wrote out and focus on what I really want instead of what I went through. The second one commented on how well-constructed, with my use of puncuation and play on syntax. I guess I have to work on it some more. A revised copy is due Tuesday, so we'll see how well things go from there.

Well, I should get back with the skit stuff. =)

School

I've been drinking apple juice lately. My throat hurts like heck. I hate the need to cough.

Coughing reminds me of a good friend. I'm pretty sure he didn't make it up, but the first time I heard these words were from him: "Love is like a cough. As hard as you try, it's something you can't stiffle." Or something along those lines...

There's a Laker/Suns game tonight. Hoping (again) that the Lakers will win and I'm expecting them to win. Hopefully I have time to watch it in between all the work I have to do tonight.

Using a computer from school. I really hate the keyboard. Oh well.

Anyway, I was walking toward this computer room and I saw like a gazillion people whom I know. It's really sad how if you know someone, you don't really say hi. Sometimes, you even look away while walking past the person you someone know while they do the same. It's pretty sad. Especially if the other person makes an effort to say hello. Ha.

I should get back to my original class (History). I have to do a lot of work for that class on Sunday... Month, maybe a month and half, worth of work to make up. *sigh* I deeply dispise that class. Plus, I have to read a whole book for philosophy and a short story.

I'll get my act together before the end of the year. I'm not saying I'm hoping that I will; I'm saying that I WILL get there.

Random Blog

Got called in for a second interview with the Peer Counselors. Don't exactly know how that goes, but I hope it's for a good thing.

I really should record the rifts and parts of songs I make. I don't remember what I create...

I got my 20 page essay/story from English back. Received a 96. =) Probably the highest grade I've ever receieved in that class. Haha. I hope it does me some good. In any case, I really want to work on it and maybe elongate it. I actually had fun writing that and incorporating all sorts of crap into it.

Anyway, off I go!